Motorcycle Diaries

Motorcycle diaries - A journey into Che Guevara's mind. A transformation. A medical student who travels across South America on a bike, then on foot. Sees the injustice. Sees the misfortune. The inequality amongst his class and theirs. The equality of the masses from the topmost tip to the southernmost coast. 

Is it just his continent? Is our 'sub' continent different? I am accused to be a romantic? I romanticize poverty. Do I? 

I feel trapped. Trapped by my skills - or the lack of them. A consultant by training. What good are these skills? How can I use them to help someone? A doctor, now he has some skills. What do I pursue. What skills do I need to help others? Communication, passion, hardwork? Only if for a cause. I know I can work hard .... but for a cause. What is that cause? How much do I earn? For whom do I earn? Do I save and distribute? No. My time is much more important. I should donate my time. 

I am trapped. Trapped in this country. In this city. Should I just go back? What to do when I do go back? Is there a plan? How can I help them? Work where. How do I find a job where I have time. But I need a plan. A very different plan. Something that no one else can help me with. Where do I start. Who do I talk to? 

Is it just momentary? Is there a job out there which will satisfy me? Without helping others? Is all that I want is a busy day .. day after day? Will I be happy if I cant decide my work? Do I question everything? Wait for recommendations. Kiss ass for recommendation! Dont anger the superiors! I dont care. Anglo-saxon pleasure seekers. Viruses on the face of this planet. Sad, pathetic souls.

The true expression of oneself - disease induced

I saw a new episode of 'House' today. It is a series set in a US hospital in which an eccentric yet brilliant doctor, Dr. Gregory House, chases down a medical mystery during the entire length of an episode and finally solves it just in the nick of time to the amazement and gratification of the supporting cast. 

In this episode, the patient suffers from a disease that renders his speech involuntary. As a result, he cannot stop himself from saying things that he would otherwise have kept to himself. I had read the description of the episode before watching it and even though I did think of it as an interesting plot, the ways in which this disease manifested itself was hilarious.

The patient is waiting for his MRI and a hot doctor enters the room. The guy says, "Oh my god! You are so hot! I just want to rip your clothes off and dip you in chocolate so that I can lick it off you later". Next scence - he covers his face and says in a muffled voice "I am so sorry for saying that!". Next scence, a senior doctor, also hot, enters. The guy goes "Oh my god! You are even hotter! I would definitely do you! I would do you both, but given a choice, I will do you first!". Next scence, he says "Please dont throw me out". Awesome !

However, on a serious note, the situation does offer one question. Is a person defined by what he thinks, or is a person what he chooses to say? I would imagine that almost all of us dont say what we think more often than saying what we really do think. Since we have been brought up to be respectful of others, to be polite, we often lose ourselves in it. We turn into someone who we really are not. We think something, and we say something else. And the facade remains intact till we remain. Unless you get a disease like that!  

Hello Again - I hope I am back for good

Hello All,

There are not many who follow this blog. However, to the few who do, or did, hello again! I discontinued writing some months back because of 2 main reasons. First, I didn't have much too write about. I now realize that that shouldn't have stopped me. Many people just write gibberish and others find ways to make sense out of it. I could be one of them! The second reason was that I felt that I had lost touch with the skill of writing. Each time I wrote a blog, the words seemed not to do justice to the breadth of emotion that I wanted to express. Moreover, it took too much time to craft a gramatically well balanced paragraph. Accepting it as a skill I didn't have, I dropped blogging altogether.

However, during the past few weeks, I had to write a site-visit report for an NGO I volunteer for. Writing that report reminded me of the joy of writing those well balanced paragraphs that I had come to hate. It still took me many hours to complete the report which a better writer could have finished in only a couple. But still, the joy of reading through those painstakingly well crafterd sentences was a very satisfying compensation indeed. 

My advice to writers who face a block just like I did is to keep it simple! Just go back to the basics of sentence construction. I know that its difficult to stem the flow of thoughts but writing is not about stemming it at all. Its about funneling it. Pour those thoughts slowly and steadily and you will have something well written in the end.